A goal to achieve; something I lack.
Insecurity, holding me back.
All my excuses, I’m losing track.
I’m on my last rope, I’m losing slack.
I’ve hit a wall with no where to go.
I done a lot, with nothing to show.
It looks like I’ve lost my inner glow.
I should do something, but I don’t know.
I feel so helpless, I want to scream
Instead of acting, I only dream
And let my thoughts run along a stream
I had a good run, I’m out of steam.
I’m out of options, so I’ll just stay.
I’ll figure it out some other day.
I feel this apathy holding sway.
Maybe some day it will go away.
– Shaman Romney 2018
I have parasocial friends
Parasocial loves
Parasocial enemies
Parasocial colleagues
A panoply of parasocial people
But no actual social life.
– Shaman Romney 2017
Day in, day out
You bash your head against the wall
Heart filled with doubt
“Is it worth trying at all?”
(But still)
Day in, day out
You bash your head until it breaks
Heart filled with doubt
The panic in your mind awakes
(Yet still)
Day in, day out
You bash your head until you bleed
Heart filled with doubt
No rescue in your time of need
(No will)
Day in, day out
You bash your head, about to die
Heart filled with doubt
You no longer want to try
(Until)
Day in, day out
You raise your head up to the light
Heart still with doubt
“Did I really win this fight?”
(You will)
Day in, day out
You raise your head up, full of pride
Heart freed from doubt
You made it through.
You survived.
– Shaman Romney 2016
Life is a struggle
Full of hardship, full of pain.
With strength gained through hope
– Shaman Romney 2015
I’m tired of trying
to win life’s game.
The out come always
feels the same.
I get knocked down Twenty
I get up Twenty One
Will the next time I’m knocked down
be when I’m done?
I’ll just keep on fighting
There is no other way
Here’s to hoping
I get it right someday.
Shaman Romney 2014
