Shame on The Universe   Poetry and Thoughts on the Universe

Maybe I have been to hard on Soylent. Sure, it tastes awful, but is it objectively that bad?

I had a friend comment on Facebook, asking me if it really hated it that much. She’s been using it since October (not like for every meal like I have been) and doesn’t think its as bad as I make it out to bye.

Her suggestion was flavoring it, which for the purposes of this challenge I can’t do (although I may use the matcha powder idea later), her question helped me realize something.

Most of my hate for Soylent is in my head.

Sure, the texture can be a bit grainy, and it leaves an interesting aftertaste. But the way I talk about it, you’d think I’m eating battery acid. But it’s just oat flour and rice protein.

What really tastes bad is my poor diet habits dying. The desire to go out for lunch every day, or to eat a large fry at McDonald’s. The urge to fill my boredom and sadness up with nacho cheese instead of dealing with them properly. The security of having food in front of me to curb the anxiety of being around people.

They call this phenomenon an extinction burst. Although it sound like a move a video-game boss would use (Ronald McDonald uses EXTINCTION BURST! It’s super effective!), it is when your mind, in an attempt to keep things the same and stable, will throw on last tantrum before finally cleaning it’s room. Extinction Bursts are why many diets fail, why people stay smokers, why gamblers stay gambling, and why you probably can’t stop biting your fingernails. It is why I am expecting to break at some point and eat real food. I’m not trying to avoid it, I am anticipating it so I can keep it from completely derailing me.

I’m pretty sure this will be the week I break. But at least I’ve made it two weeks, part of me thought I wouldn’t make it two hours. I’m proud off making it half way. I just hope I break eating something good, not some crappy cheeseburger from McDonald’s.

Aside from the mental battle, I feel great! I still only eat 750-1000 calories, but I think my body is used to it now.

I had my daughter this weekend. I am surprised she didn’t ask me what I was eating at all, even when we went out to eat. Not that I’m complaining; I was sure she would pressure me with adorableness into eating food. But the opposite happened, and she got my mind off of eating anything.

Not the most eventful week food-wise, but that’s a good thing. Here’s to the remaining two being just as uneventful.

-Shaman